Was able to spend the weekend at Emanuel House and help with Child Sponsorship mailings, oh yeah and hang out with some pretty cool chicks! |
I have spent 4 weeks back in the US and honestly the transition was easier than I anticipated (although I'm FREEZING!!!), which is a HUGE answer to prayer. I've been able to see and hang out with friends and family and honestly it was like I never left. Sure some of the kids are a little older, but it was to my advantage because I'm loving getting to know their changing personalities. It's also given me time to help out and encourage those that I haven't been able to in the past 9 months...and work on some things like prayer cards and support letters.
The hardest thing being in the States is the lack of consistency. In my quiet time, in my church attendance, in the bed that I sleep in...obviously the toughest ones is my quiet time and church. I'm back and forth between Allegany and Buffalo and Rochester and who knows where else. It's great to keep up with currently friendships and relationships, but it's hard to form new ones. I'll have 6 weeks when I get back and am praying that the time is fruitful...whatever that may look like.
I really had no agenda when I came back, just to be available and to hang out and help. I've been able to bless and encourage others and in turn I have been blessed and encouraged myself. Last night I attended the first night of the High School 'Kosmos' conference, and had little to no expectations. But just being there, singing and then hearing God's Word touched my heart.
Luke 17:11-19 (NLT)
11 As Jesus continued on toward Jerusalem, he reached the border between Galilee and Samaria. 12 As he entered a village there, ten lepers stood at a distance,
13 crying out, “Jesus, Master, have mercy on us!”
14 He looked at them and said, “Go show yourselves to the priests.”
And as they went, they were cleansed of their leprosy.
15 One of them, when he saw that he was healed, came back to Jesus, shouting, “Praise God!”
16 He fell to the ground at Jesus’ feet, thanking him for what he had done. This man was a Samaritan.
17 Jesus asked, “Didn’t I heal ten men? Where are the other nine?
18 Has no one returned to give glory to God except this foreigner?”
19 And Jesus said to the man, “Stand up and go. Your faith has healed you.”
The main speaker used this passage to talk about how we sometimes have to be active in our healing and in our changing as we see in verse 14. The men had to GO, and it was only then...after they had begun their journey as lepers that they were cleansed. It was good stuff!!! But it was one of the last statements that really caught my attention. Jesus healed 10 men, but only 1 returned to thank him. And here's the kicker...Jesus, knower of all things, knew that the other 9 wouldn't come back BUT HE HEALED THEM ANYWAYS.
We have to assume that no everyone will come back to thank us. We have to prepare that the numbers of people in the seats aren't always going to grow, that the people won't come back, that we may never see people again. But should that prevent us from doing what God called us to do? ABSOLUTELY NOT. And it's a hard choice to make, to keep doing things over and over. But it's worth it. Jesus healed them anyway. We have to do it (whatever 'it' is) anyway.
It's a struggle for me. There are some GAP students that I may never see or talk to again. And that's ok. Actually there are very few students from all of my teams, small groups, bible studies combined that I will never see again. And that's ok. Does that mean I wasted my time and my breath? NO. I was faithful to what God called me to in that season. I was able to glorify God through my obedience, through the way I lived my life, and that's all God has asked of me. The way people respond to that (although we always want to know that what we've done made a difference) is not actually our concern.
"Let the Lord judge the peoples. Vindicate me, Lord, according to my righteousness,
according to my integrity, O Most High." -Psalm 7:8
according to my integrity, O Most High." -Psalm 7:8
No matter if the students come back, no matter if the people I help return to me, no matter if anyone anywhere ever says thank you. It was worth it. As long as my heart is pure and I'm doing the will of God, it will ALWAYS be worth it. I don't say that I do it right every time or most times, but that's what I have to strive for...that's the example set before me in Luke 17.
So I'll do it anyway. Again. And again. Until the Lord tells me not to. And I'll have to remind myself to do it anways. Again. And again. That no matter what the outcome is, sharing my life, being vulnerable, pouring my life out...for the sake of the Gospel, it is worth it.
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